About Me
My name is Torba (DebenTorba). I am an Electrical Engineering student and a scout from Germany. My life is a blend of technology, nature, and the things I love so deeply. I am a creator at heart, whether I am coding in Python, HTML, CSS, JavaScript, or Lua for my game [AMG], folding origami late into the night, or finding something worth keeping in a thrift store. Beyond the screen, you will find me skating through the streets, getting lost in a good manga, chasing the adrenaline of airsoft, or taking long, quiet late-night drives when the world finally goes still.
Nature is where I go to breathe. My background in scouting naturally led me toward cave diving, I find the absolute stillness of the caverns, the intense physical workout, and the rare cave wildlife incredibly exciting. When I am above ground, I focus my [photography] on the delicate beauty of animals and flowers, while also pursuing my passion for urban exploration. There is something truly enchanting about those empty, forgotten places where humans have moved on and nature has begun to take over, reclaiming the landscape in its own way.
Because I care for these spaces deeply, a value instilled in me through years of scouting, I always carry a small bag on my trips to collect trash. It disgusts me how some people carelessly toss away plastic and glass, endangering wildlife and risking forest fires. I strongly advise you to do the same to help keep our planet healthy. Back at home, I share my space with my rabbit Void, a chaotic and beloved creature who, despite my best efforts, has developed a very annoying and inexplicable appetite for my PC cables.
Music has always run through my life like a thread. I enjoy singing, and I previously played the drums and cajón in a band. I listen widely: from Mozart and ABBA to Rock and Reggae. I achually have made a huge playlist of music that i recomend. You can view it [Here], its a big mish-mash of a looot of diffrent songs. My favorite artists, in no particular order, are [Rammstein], [Corvus Corax], [IFA Wartburg], [KEYGEN_CHURCH], [Miracle Musical], [Frank Klepacki], [King Gizzard And The Lizard Wizard], [vivivivivi] and [Femtanyl].
If you want to keep up with what I’m doing or just see where else I hang out, you can find all my socials and links on my [Net] page. I also run a modded Minecraft server; it’s a project I put a lot of heart into, and I’d love to have you there. To get whitelisted and join the community, you’ll need to hop into our Discord you can find that invite link on the same [Net] page as well.
I hold a fundamental truth close to my heart: every human being has the right to exist. We all bleed red, and yet I look out at the world and see empathy slowly disappearing. People have retreated into their own bubbles, while others have chosen to exploit their fellow human beings for financial gain, indifferent to the suffering, or even the lives, lost in the process. This absence of care is a wound in the fabric of society, and it is one I feel called to help heal.
I have grown weary of a world where profit comes before people. Where companies, bloated by their own reach, believe their size exempts them from decency. I miss deeply the time when things were built out of love and passion, when what you created was a reflection of who you were, not a calculation of what could be extracted from those who trusted you.
This same emptiness is why I am troubled by what technology, and AI in particular, has become. Beyond its growing environmental toll, it is being used to poison the very fabric of human connection, spreading fabricated videos to destroy innocent lives, and being twisted into a tool to violate and exploit women and children. At its core, it is a failure of humanity, and I refuse to be indifferent to it.
My Beliefs
My spiritual identity is a journey rooted in complexity. I was raised in Reformed Theology but also shaped by Roman Catholic Theology through scouting. I believe the Ten Commandments and the Scout Laws provide a vital moral compass, yet I find it troubling that so many "Christians" fail to follow even these simple rules. In the Bible, it states, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,” and it saddens me how many who preach that "Jesus loves you" harbor hatred for those with different worldviews: whether they are atheists, gay, trans, or hold different political views. If one requires the threat of eternal damnation to act with kindness toward others, there are deeper issues at hand.
I continue to struggle with my own faith. I find myself closest to Reformed Theology, as I have reservations regarding the Catholic Church’s tendency to place saints and Mary on a pedestal that sometimes seems to eclipse God. Believing in God today is not easy: it is a constant journey. I pray and offer thanks when something good happens, and I seek guidance when I feel helpless, though I often feel that simply asking for blessings is not enough. While I enjoy the community and kindness of the Reformed church, my view of the Divine is broader. I believe there is a God, a higher power, though I do not claim to know His exact nature. When I consider the astronomical improbability of our existence, I feel there must be something bigger than ourselves.
The question of why a Creator allows us to suffer or die in cruel ways remains a difficult topic. I do not have a definitive answer, but I often reflect on a perspective shared by my dear friend: "i believe in a higher being watching over us. you, me, everyone. sometimes it likes to challenge it's creatures, by constantly pushing obsticles towards them and watch them fight, for fun. sometimes it gives or mercilessly takes away. But our Fates are not fully written. Only partially. and it's our purpose to finish those lines". While I don’t fully agree with this view, I share it because it challenges the mind. I also recognize faults in the Bible, such as how the creation of Eve may have been misstranslated, perhaps deliberately. While the historical validity of some stories is questionable, I find beauty in them much like one enjoys a great novel. Ultimately, everyone carries their own interpretation of the Divine. I deeply respect beliefs that differ from my own and would love to hear how you view the question of God. I find that these different perspectives always offer a fascinating new light.
The Vitakross — Our Symbol
Our symbol, the Vitakross, derives its name from: the Latin Vita (meaning life, or a noble way of living) and the ancient Germanic Kross (representing a structural cross or moral anchor) and is born from the union of two ancient and powerful icons: the Ankh and the traditional Christian cross, merged together with deliberate additions to create something entirely our own.
The Ankh, originating from ancient Egypt, is one of humanity's oldest symbols of life. By incorporating it, we acknowledge that life is not ours to waste or destroy, and that we must protect human existence with fierce devotion. The Christian cross grounds us in values that have guided people for millennia: humility, love, sacrifice, and grace. It calls us to love our neighbors as ourselves, to forgive as we wish to be forgiven, to show compassion to the vulnerable, and to live not for selfish gain but in service to others. Sometimes being nice is incredibly hard, but when you put goodness out into the world, it returns to you. We treat others exactly how we want to be treated.
Together, this symbol is at once a declaration, a bond, and a personal promise. A declaration that we stand for life, respect, and human dignity. A bond: a sign to others that when they see it, they are in the presence of someone who genuinely cares. And a personal promise: a daily commitment to hold ourselves to a higher standard. We carry this symbol not as a mark of perfection, but as a constant, humble reminder of who we are striving to become.
The Sodanitas
To bring these beliefs into the physical world, we have formed a community called The Sodanitas. Borrowed from classical history, a sodanitas was an ancient Latin fellowship or fraternity bound by a sacred oath of mutual aid and companionship. We are not a rigid, faceless organization, but an active, growing union of open-minded people bound together by this shared code. It is an oath to hold ourselves accountable, ensuring we show up for one another in good times and bad, supporting each other financially, physically, and emotionally.
In a world that has learned to treat people as disposable resources, we choose deliberately and consciously to treat each other as family. We believe that human beings are never a means to an end, and we know we are far stronger together than we will ever be apart.
This site exists as a gathering place for that shared path. If you believe that we owe each other care, that nature deserves our protection, and that a community built on real, living values is worth fighting for, then our growing fellowship welcomes you. Come join those of us who have already taken the oath, and help us continue to build something that family can rely on.
I love you all. The busyness of life keeps us apart more than I would like, but you are never truly far from my thoughts. I look through the tinted glass of nostalgia often, and I feel the weight of friendships lost to time, to distance, or to endings that were painful and unresolved.
I will be honest: I struggle with something like a long-term object permanence the way a thing can slip out of my immediate focus without ever leaving my heart. I do not forget the people I love. But I sometimes need a reminder that the world continues to exist beyond the edges of whatever I am consumed by. It is a frustrating thing to live with, and I hate that it makes the people I care about feel further away than they are.
The hiraeth is stong. Still, the impulse remains to search for those I once knew, even knowing that "it will never be like it was back then." Everything is different now, and while that truth is sometimes a hard one to sit with, the memories of those late nights, those endless hours spent together, are precious to me. They are part of what drives the Brotherhood community I am dreaming to build today. I carry those people with me as I move forward. I hope, wherever you are, that you are well.
